Remember long ago when I wrote of my estranged friend?? I honestly don't recall how far I ever made it with that story... but, for now we're picking up in the present. Tonight I went to a party at her house, but only after much debate. I was slightly anxious as I would be reunited with some members of her family. Some that I haven't seen in almost a decade but knew well growing up. Like family. I'm glad I went. The atmosphere was right for this type of meeting and it was really good to see them. Lots of hugs all around.
When I came home - which was about an hour later than anticipated being I had planned a quick escape prior to going - BigCat was fast asleep. He did, however, rise to the occasion (what? my coming home isn't an occasion?) long enough to hear my excitement... about cleaning products. See, it wasn't just a party, it was a Norwex "party". I could hardly contain myself when I was given a sample of this environmentally friendly, good for your health laundry detergent and two "rags" to try on my way out. For the first time in... well, let me see... forever, I was incredibly eager to clean. So much so that I tried one rag on the windshield of my car before leaving the party and a different on a few spots on the carpet walking into my house. Awesome.
I just don't get why BigCat wasn't excited about the rags too! But, I was really glad that he sleepily claimed to be excited about my excitement. :-)
Showing posts with label anxious. Show all posts
Showing posts with label anxious. Show all posts
11.19.2009
3.05.2009
Lunch Gabber
Just wanted to let you know a couple of things. One, I went back to the doctor on Tuesday for an x-ray to see whether the two stents had passed. My mom and I had high hopes for a clean bill of health and a fun lunch date ahead. We were wrong. Instead, I was checked-in, IV'd, put under and had a tube shoved down my throat. One of the two had not passed on its own. On a high note, I'm hoping this helps to relieve the pain I continue to feel. I was very disappointed the beginning of this week when my pain was back, as it was before, but worse... it lasted all day now instead of coming and going. What was I thinking signing myself up for so much?!?!
Secondly, I wanted to let you know that tonight is the night of the dreaded dinner date with my recently reconnected, formerly estranged, friend. I say dreaded because the anxiety is a bit on the high end. I think overall it will be very good... just gotta get past this first one! I will keep you posted as to how it turns out in the end.
That's all for now folks!
Secondly, I wanted to let you know that tonight is the night of the dreaded dinner date with my recently reconnected, formerly estranged, friend. I say dreaded because the anxiety is a bit on the high end. I think overall it will be very good... just gotta get past this first one! I will keep you posted as to how it turns out in the end.
That's all for now folks!
2.28.2009
Life Haps
Over the last few weeks, along with my surgery, there were some other life happenings; changes made, goals set. Obviously, I had very high expectations of becoming well.
I:
* Joined - Anytime Fitness. Remember, way back when, when I was running?!?! I haven't been exercising with the SOD factor. It's been a long, long while and I'm very excited to start a regimen again.
* Registered - For the 2009 Breast Cancer 3-Day. I feel like I'm going to be taking part in something HUGE. Something outside of my personal box. I intend for this to be one of my greatest life experiences.
* Purchased - A new cell phone. Except it's hardly a cell phone - it's a palm pilot, mp3, camera, radio, texting, surfing, amazing device. It's going to take me a year to learn its ins and outs.
* Enrolled - in school. The thought of obtaining my MBA has been with me for years... and now I'm going for it and can hardly believe it. I am so excited! Beginning March 17th, I will officially be a student again. In the past, I hesitated with a program being entirely online, however, it is the only schooling that suits my life, so I am grateful to be able to do so.
I am looking forward to this year being full of challenge, growth and excitement!
I:
* Joined - Anytime Fitness. Remember, way back when, when I was running?!?! I haven't been exercising with the SOD factor. It's been a long, long while and I'm very excited to start a regimen again.
* Registered - For the 2009 Breast Cancer 3-Day. I feel like I'm going to be taking part in something HUGE. Something outside of my personal box. I intend for this to be one of my greatest life experiences.
* Purchased - A new cell phone. Except it's hardly a cell phone - it's a palm pilot, mp3, camera, radio, texting, surfing, amazing device. It's going to take me a year to learn its ins and outs.
* Enrolled - in school. The thought of obtaining my MBA has been with me for years... and now I'm going for it and can hardly believe it. I am so excited! Beginning March 17th, I will officially be a student again. In the past, I hesitated with a program being entirely online, however, it is the only schooling that suits my life, so I am grateful to be able to do so.
I am looking forward to this year being full of challenge, growth and excitement!
2.16.2009
Power of Prayer
I told you it would go quickly... it's already the eve of my procedure day. Mixed emotions are brewing now that I'm finally slowing down and have only a nights sleep (if I'm lucky) before it's surgery time. I pray - and ask you all to as well - that everything goes smoothly tomorrow and that we achieve the desired outcome. I could be a whole new me, or at least an improved me, in the days to come. On the other hand, if it doesn't work as hoped, it will affect my life more as time goes on. But, I'll worry about that later. For now I'm settled on fretting about the fast-approaching procedure.
The daily discomfort started approximately seven months ago and has consumed too much of my life since then. It has affected my personal potential at work, and more importantly, at home. To put it in perspective, it's been a factor almost half of Bubba's life with Mama. So, I ask for your help... because I do believe in the power of prayer.
The daily discomfort started approximately seven months ago and has consumed too much of my life since then. It has affected my personal potential at work, and more importantly, at home. To put it in perspective, it's been a factor almost half of Bubba's life with Mama. So, I ask for your help... because I do believe in the power of prayer.
1.27.2009
POMS
I'm at a loss for blog thoughts lately. There are so many bigger things going on - bigger than anything I would attempt to write about. Indescribable thoughts circling around, flitting about constantly throughout the day. It's like the feeling suggested when you hear "in the pit of your stomach". It isn't an easily described feeling, but we all know what it is.
I can think of many moments in my life when I felt it in the 'pit of my stomach' -POMS. Most of my POMS memories are unpleasant ones, or at least anxiety-ridden... forgetting a paper that was due that morning, finding out a loved one has cancer, hearing that he was going to be at the party, an argument with someone of significance, a death... I can feel it in the POMS now with just mention of these memories.
Where I am right now, in this life, will be a time remembered like those above. When I think back, I will be able to feel it all again. I'm not altogether sure it's a good thing, but I do know it has a great impact on the person I have come to be... and will grow to be.
I can think of many moments in my life when I felt it in the 'pit of my stomach' -POMS. Most of my POMS memories are unpleasant ones, or at least anxiety-ridden... forgetting a paper that was due that morning, finding out a loved one has cancer, hearing that he was going to be at the party, an argument with someone of significance, a death... I can feel it in the POMS now with just mention of these memories.
Where I am right now, in this life, will be a time remembered like those above. When I think back, I will be able to feel it all again. I'm not altogether sure it's a good thing, but I do know it has a great impact on the person I have come to be... and will grow to be.
1.06.2009
Booking Backwards
It's so unlike me, and some may find it hard to believe, but I am doing things out of order. I saw the Twilight movie with my galpal a month ago; I debated going only because I hadn't read the book. If a movie is based on a book, I read the book, then catch the flick (like Marley and Me, which BigCat and I saw tonight... Sarah says 4/5 stars, 10/10 tears). The Twilight story was so enthralling I had to continue on, immediately starting the second novel, New Moon. Although I do not regret my decision to see the movie pre-read, the written Twilight has been nagging at me the entire time.
With New Moon finished I am backtracking to Twilight, the novel. At this stage in life, reading a story I already know is incredibly beneficial. Lately there have been many things clogging my brain, when reading it easily veers to other thoughts. Sometimes I'll read an entire page before I realize I haven't captured a thing. And tomorrow I have the EUS (see previous blog*), so there will be plenty of waiting time, great for reading except for my easy distraction by those bustling around me. In either instance, I won't have to waste time reading words I missed the first time... I can just concentrate on finishing the book and being back on the right away.
* If the color contrast isn't great and you can't tell, you can click on the word "blog" above to read about the EUS. It will underline it while you hover as well - for future reference (I like to use this feature).
With New Moon finished I am backtracking to Twilight, the novel. At this stage in life, reading a story I already know is incredibly beneficial. Lately there have been many things clogging my brain, when reading it easily veers to other thoughts. Sometimes I'll read an entire page before I realize I haven't captured a thing. And tomorrow I have the EUS (see previous blog*), so there will be plenty of waiting time, great for reading except for my easy distraction by those bustling around me. In either instance, I won't have to waste time reading words I missed the first time... I can just concentrate on finishing the book and being back on the right away.
* If the color contrast isn't great and you can't tell, you can click on the word "blog" above to read about the EUS. It will underline it while you hover as well - for future reference (I like to use this feature).
12.11.2008
It's all about me!
BigCat and I use the title phrase often - it's the joke about who it's really all about in our household at a given time... him or me. Ha! I think we all know it's really all about the Bird. However, this time, this post, is going to be all about me - a benefit of hosting your own blog.
Yesterday, I visited the specialist again to discuss the next steps in determining the cause of my daily abdominal pain. It is believed that I suffer from Pancreas Divisum. For an information overflow on the subject, you may click here, but I will describe in short.
Normally, before birth, the two ducts of the pancreas fuse to create one. Pancreas Divisum is an anomaly in which the ducts do not fuse together, so the fluid drains from two separate ducts. Because of this, the larger one is left with more to drain and not a large enough opening to do so, creating a fluid back-up in the pancreas and causing pain.
On January 7th, I am having an Endoscopic Ultrasound done. This should verify that we're dealing with PD. If so, I have a procedure scheduled for January 15th, an ERCP with a sphincterotomy. The procedure is scrutinized by some, but I am in the hands of an excellent doctor and this is his thing. The biggest downfall... there's only a 50% success rate. However, even with that and other risks, the possible benefits outweigh everything.
Yesterday, I visited the specialist again to discuss the next steps in determining the cause of my daily abdominal pain. It is believed that I suffer from Pancreas Divisum. For an information overflow on the subject, you may click here, but I will describe in short.
Normally, before birth, the two ducts of the pancreas fuse to create one. Pancreas Divisum is an anomaly in which the ducts do not fuse together, so the fluid drains from two separate ducts. Because of this, the larger one is left with more to drain and not a large enough opening to do so, creating a fluid back-up in the pancreas and causing pain.
On January 7th, I am having an Endoscopic Ultrasound done. This should verify that we're dealing with PD. If so, I have a procedure scheduled for January 15th, an ERCP with a sphincterotomy. The procedure is scrutinized by some, but I am in the hands of an excellent doctor and this is his thing. The biggest downfall... there's only a 50% success rate. However, even with that and other risks, the possible benefits outweigh everything.
11.14.2008
Driving Miss Crazy
Make copies
Check phone
Meet with co-worker
Check phone
Little Girl's room
Check phone
Get mail
Check phone
Nothing
Nothing
Nothing
It's making me nutty.
Check phone
Meet with co-worker
Check phone
Little Girl's room
Check phone
Get mail
Check phone
Nothing
Nothing
Nothing
It's making me nutty.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
